You don't love me?

This morning the title of my devotion was “Overcoming feeling Unloved”. I couldn’t help but take a stroll down memory lane as I was studying it this morning. Do you remember your first love? Do you remember how you felt when the relationship ended. Here was my deal…….I was usually the one to break up with whomever, but it was usually b/c I would sense that something wasn’t going good, of course the boy would be DEVASTATED (heee!!! just kidding!!!), and then I would go on about my life. But, what I can’t help but laugh at, is that everyone I dated MOVED ON. I would always have this feeling, like an “oh poor me”, feeling whenever the boy would find someone new, and I hadn’t yet! Like, wait a minute, You said you loved me??? Even though I was the one who broke up with them!! I know……really messed up thinking! Poor Kris, He even went around that circle with me, we laugh at how many times we broke up!! But that boy kept coming back! If there could be one word I had to describe Kris it would be, faithful. Eventually I was sold! =)

But I think what Beth Moore was trying to get at today was that many times we think our desires for love and or things, becomes a need. I have been there! It’s truly all about finding satisfaction in HIM. I think about this period that our family is getting ready to embark on, a time of really NO POSSESSIONS. We won’t have anything that says, “This is who I am”. Well, I have a van, but so does most moms. Ok, so the world will be able to say, “You are a mom”. =) It’s been funny this week as so much of our stuff is already in storage, it’s truly AMAZING how little you can live on! Now, I will say, I have really missed having a couch to sit on at night. But, I’ve realized I CAN live without certain things. The girls each have one basket of toys, and guess what? They have not ONCE said, Gee I wish I had……….. or…………….

My point is this, the more we try to fill ourselves with possessions, the less satisfied in life I think we’ll be. But the more we fill ourselves with him, we will and can begin to experience that true joy. No love, no relationship, no possession and no amount of money compares to this verse: Colossians 2:10, “Ye are complete in Him.” I love this lesson that Christ is teaching me. There are so many lessons I am learning through this time: Faithfulness, Trust, PURE JOY, Time management, making life more simple and where I place my hope. I just truly can’t wait to see where God leads us. That song, “I’ll lead you home”, I know it’s not about an earthy home, but it really spoke to me the other day as I heard it on the radio.

I have to tell you this story about Ms. Kennedy Grace. OH MY OH MY. She has started this spitting thing, at first we all thought it was cute and funny, but it’s not so funny anymore. She was doing it first just to be cute, but the past two weeks or so, I’ve noticed that she’s doing it more and more out of aggression and anger. Well, the other day, I told her no about something and swatted her little hands, and she sat there and spit at me. So, I told her a FIRM NO, and she continued to do it, I continued to tell her no and she just wouldn’t stop, in fact she was becoming louder and spitting harder! So, she got her little mouth popped. Well, she sat there for a moment and stuck that little lip out……..looked at me, like, “I don’t think so……” and she spit at me again, and THEN POPPED HERSELF on the mouth!!! At that point I just couldn’t help it, I had to leave the room, I was dying of laughter!!! Don’t you HATE that, you’re trying SO hard to discipline but it’s so funny!!!

Well, only five more days until we are completely out. We got a lot done this weekend. I was EXHAUSTED last night. The girls actually were big helpers. Taylor and I have had many talks about this move. She is quite a talker!!! I think she’s going to survive =). She just gets so stressed out about change! Today is a day of just trying to make sense of the stuff that is left! Although there’s not much, there’s just little stuff everywhere, that’s worse than getting the big stuff out! I’m also going for a run this morning. Gotta get back into it! I’ve been really bad about running lately.

I still haven’t heard back from the girls test results, I’m very anxious to see as Kennedy was sick again on Saturday. Hope seems to be doing better, but this is what they do, they are ok for a couple of days and then boom, it hits them all over again. I just want to know what it is. Well, hungry girls await, I’d better go. I pray you have a blessed day!!