[Thanks to everyone who tweeted, facebooked and spread the word about Sun Stand Still. I know this book is reaching thousands every day and I wish I could give away more than one! But the winner is….Charlotte! Please e-mail me at: nickikoziarz@yahoo.com your shipping information and I will get your book to you asap. ]
So, my oldest baby is 10. I only had five one emotional breakdown throughout the days festivities.
Per Taylor’s request, we had a little sleepover on Friday night with 8 of her friends. Now, I love the sleepovers -I do. But have mercy for the 10 year-old sleepovers. There was no dress-up, pin the tiara on the princess or sweet dreams at 10 pm. Un-uh.
This was the real deal.
Enormous amounts of food was engulfed, soda needed to be on a tap, and the noise? Oh the noise. Herds of elephants had nothing on these girls and their stomping, jumping, dancing feet. And I almost couldn’t contain my sleep deprived motherhood brain at 1am when I came downstairs to see what all the hootin and hollering was about. They were…playing school. At 1am.
I could think of great things to do at 1am: sleep!
But what I was not prepared for was the brutality infected sweet lips of honesty that showed up at this house. I am all about speaking truth into people’s lives…yes, but Lord help the 10 year-olds when they speak truth.
One of the girls was not impressed with my couch. She felt the need to relish me with information about how her couches were more comfortable at her house. Glory to God. I could have possibly whispered under my breath, “Go home, please.”
And another decided I needed to know the most valuable information about her: That her favorite number was indeed the number…two. To which I looked carefully at her to make sure she meant to say exactly that [because at that point of the night…I just wasn’t sure anymore] She then replied, “Oh but not THAT number two.” [Lord help us all]
During our gift opening time, my daughter may or may not have embarrassed the living daylights out of me when she announced to the entire room that Kris’s grandmother [who was in the room] had given her $25 THIS year. As to indicate in previous years…she had not. [sighs]
But a little game called “four things” is what desperately sent me over the edge into a laughter induced coma for days now. In this game every girl was handed in index card and a pen. She had to write four things on the card that no one would know about her. The cards were then collected and we had to guess who it was on the card based on the four things given.
I kid you not, it was like a game of verbal arson. I cringed through every four things I read about those girls! It was a lot of TMI [to much info] but it got me thinking about when that innocence of honesty fades from our tongues.
But, what if we had the chance to anonymously write something on a card and just say it? What would we say? Who would we want to hear it?
I’m convinced there would be a lot of truth spoken.
The truth is: truth sets us free. While this example of a silly game may not be so relatable to the perception of truth in our hearts…the truth is still the truth.
Here’s what I saw: after we had read all the cards, most of the girls felt more connected, vulnerable and ready to dive into their friendships more. The good, the bad, and the ugly…it all came out. We laughed and then we moved on.
As grown women there’s a lot of wisdom to be gained from that little 10 year-old game of honesty. Sometimes, we just care to much what other people are going to say if we speak truth. I cannot tell you though how many times I’ve said what I needed to say and it actually went over well. And, there have been times when I have said what I wanted to and it didn’t go over well at all. But the fact of the matter was, at the end of the day I was able to breathe a little easier because the truth had set me free.
I’m reminded of this quote by Henry Adams: “No one means all he says yet very few say all they mean.”
I’m challenged today to think about my words. May they not be “just sayin” words -but words of truth spoken by a heart of love and an inner truth that has set me free.
When 10 year-olds speak truth, something to chew on…that’s for sure.
